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My 5 Favorite Ways to Remember Loved Ones

I’ve discovered fantastic opportunities for remembering and celebrating my loved ones. And I want you to know them, too. My search for fun and practical ideas started because my mom and dad died pretty young, and then my aunt and uncle passed away a few years later. The strategies I’ve found take advantage of every sense — concepts that harness the power of what I taste, see, smell, touch, and hear.

Whether it was last year or decades ago that you lost someone close to your heart, there are numerous concrete ways to celebrate what they still mean to you. In my book, Passed and Present: Keeping Memories of Loved Ones Alive, I reveal 85 fun and innovative strategies for remembering and honoring those we never want to forget. I call these uplifting concepts Forget Me Nots. Here are five of my favorites.

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Preparing Your Best Holiday Playlist Ever, and a Secret About My Family

Now is the perfect time to create your best holiday playlist ever, songs to accompany all your upcoming dinners and celebrations. “Music is one of the strongest tethers we have to the past,” Kenneth Bilby, a former director at the Center for Black Music Research at Columbia College Chicago in Chicago, tells me. “It’s a critically important carrier of memory.” It’s with this notion in mind that I’m revealing a story about my family I’ve never shared. I hope you find it helpful as you plan your holiday playlist.

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Making Meaningful Halloween Decorations

After my grandfather died, my grandmother took a ceramics class.  She got out of it exactly what she needed — distraction, friendship, and a sense that she could be happy and engaged once again.  Grandma made more than a dozen pieces, and not too long ago, I did something I thought I’d never do:  I gave them a creepy Halloween makeover.

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Surprising Fall Opportunity

One of the most uplifting gifts I’ve ever heard of giving someone in a time of loss is a wicker basket full of daffodil bulbs. The idea is for the recipient to plant one bulb for every year the loved one lived. Daffodils are the perfect flower for such a happiness-inducing project: as perennials, they’ll come back spring after spring—and they’re virtually indestructible. And, the best time of year to plant daffodils is the fall!

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The Healing Power of Retracing Your Steps

Have you ever heard “These Foolish Things”? The song recounts a long list of sights, sounds, and objects that conjure up memories of loved ones. Take a listen here.  With a nod to this popular standard, go back to that restaurant you enjoyed together. Return to the hotel. And if, for you, this idea involves getting into nature, consider the enormous emotional benefits I write about in Passed and Present that stem from being outdoors (Forget Me Not #85).

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Tips for Repurposing Tablecloths, Linen Napkins, and Other Atypical Fabrics

My dad always wore neckties to work, so after he passed away, I hired The Gazebo to turn them into a quilt. The quilt brings back lots of happy memories, recollections I can now share with my children who never got to know their grandfather. You can see a picture of this beautiful quilt here. But discovering opportunities for upcycling other types of fabric is often more challenging. What to do with table linens, kitchen towels, aprons, and placemats?

In my book, Passed and Present: Keeping Memories of Loved Ones Alive, Forget Me Not #10 reveals several ways to repurpose fabric not usual considered for memorial projects. Nancy Roy, owner of Totes with Tales (www.toteswithtales.com), uses virtually any kind of fabric to create one-of-a-kind bags customers can use every day.

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Celebrating Dads Gone Too Soon on Father’s Day

After my father died, my stepmother longed for a quiet place outdoors to think about my dad. Cheryl’s ideal spot ended up being a secludedBuild a Refuge Wrought Iron Bench_blog spot right in her backyard. She cleared out a few weeds, bought an iron bench at a garage sale, and that was about it. A refuge was born. You can read more about this idea and many others in Passed and Present: Keeping Memories of Loved Ones Alive

My favorite part of Cheryl’s retreat is the path she made to get there. She gathered a large number of medium-sized stones and carefully positioned them one after the other until a line of rocks stretched from the side of the house to the bench.  [Read more…]

3 Ways to Use Warmer Weather to Strengthen Memories of Loved Ones

The bright yellow pop of daffodils around my neighborhood reminds me of one of the most creative ideas I’ve come across for keeping memories of loved ones alive. Read on for this innovative springtime strategy and two others.

Grow Daffodils. In a time of loss, give a wicker basket full of daffodil bulbs. The strategy here is for the recipient to plant, if possible, one bulb for every year the loved one lived. Daffodils are the perfect flower for such a happiness-inducing project: as perennials, they’ll come back spring after spring—and they’re virtually indestructible.

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Memory Bash: A Celebration of Loved Ones and What They Still Mean to Us

It’s my birthday this week! I still love my birthday. The day brings back wonderful memories of my mom and dad who always made the day special. In the years since they’ve passed away, I’ve continued making the day extraordinary — not just for me, but in celebration of their memory. I do this by taking extra care of myself, carving out time to see friends and indulging in foods that make me happy (slice of chocolate cake, anyone?).

It’s in this mindset — celebration over sadness — that I wrote my forthcoming book, Passed and Present. It’s full of fun, innovative ideas for keeping the memory of loved ones alive. I call these ideas Forget Me Nots. One of my favorite Forget Me Nots is hosting a Memory Bash. Similar to a birthday party or book club, a Memory Bash is an excuse to get together as a group — eating, drinking, and having a great time — but in this case, the focus is celebrating loved ones who have passed away in the company of others drawn to do the same. It’s a joyful concept I simply love!

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Make This the Year to Remember Intentionally

The clock struck midnight a week ago and just like that we got 365 new days full of promise. I’m a resolution person. I’m grateful for new beginnings. This year, I’ve decided to double down on my efforts to celebrate and honor loved ones intentionally.  I’m on a mission. Join me!

Whether it was last year or decades ago that you lost someone close to your heart, make this the year to do something that is a purposeful act remembrance.  On April 12, 2016 I’ll launch my book, Passed and Present: Keeping Memories of Loved Ones Alive, which is full of eighty-five ideas to commemorate those we never want to forget. I call these strategies Forget Me Nots. I’ve shared a few in my previous blogs and on Facebook, which I’ll continue.

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